10 januari

The best thing I've ever heard on 10 january, my man got a new job :')

A job that he has been dreaming to get since..two years ago I guess?

Alhamdulillah :)


Everything is currently on track..
The hikmah..we can see it now.


This is a good start for you.
I am truly happy to see you happy..

I know you will do just great as you always do..
Everyone will like you..
Trust me..


Always do your best..


Congrats  ❤️

Welcome 2018 :)

2017 has already ended..and only now I want to write about it? Hehe basically because I dont have any idea to write the other day..so here it is a little bit of what I feel about 2017 and what has happened in last yearrrr....so awkward of saying it last year because today is only 7january2018 hehe

1. I found myself started to..like appreciating and  loving myself even more..and accepting everything that has happened with redha Alhamdulillah :)

2. My two bestfriends got engaged and this is enough in making my 2017 ended wonderfully :') I got to meet them..and it was the best thing ever!!

3. In May,  my king + my new queen and I have never been so happy..i've never said this to anyone but seriously I am the happiest person :')

4. My 2nd year with arukas and i don't know why time flies so fast...

5. My semester 5 (this sem) went on quite well..i had an experience of working and seriously it was the best thing ever..i get to like really really learn how to manage my time because im juggling between working and classes.. when I think about it now i wonder why i worked the other day hahaha.. :D

6. I get to learn how to make my study notes effectively..because of working i had no time to write everything up like how i used to..i didnt do the lipat lipat notes much on this semester..instead what i did was, i use microsoft word to make my own study notes..using the 'draw text box' tool and it helps me A LOT!!!!! The two months working has made me to feel a little bit tired and i have no time to look at the notes or print them all..i got this idea from Dr Hawa because she once gave us a 'make your own notes about disease cycle' assignments' and i thought we can only do it using computer and not using hand..i mean making your note using handwriting is much easier kan but i didnt have that in my mind...last2 baru tahu boleh rupanya kalau nak guna tangan..so while doing it, i was thinking maybe i can use this way to my other notes as well and that is where it all started :) I think maybe i will be doing the same thing too in my next semester hehe..

7. I learned that you dont have to fit in, in order to be accepted by anyone..if they appreciate you then they will..there is no need for you to change or doing things for people who never notice and appreciate your presence :)

8. My mom, she gave me so many things that I could not afford with..and i love it when we can just stay in a room and talked for hours :') It's like I can feel the bond..and to realise the fact that she is getting older making me sad.. same goes to my father too.. :'(

9. My younger brother, he moved up to a new level of getting to act in theatre and I am so happy because it has been his dream to act..i didnt came to watch him the other day soo the next time is a must for me to be there..and he also got a new job Alhamdulillah :)

10. My skin are recovering so well from the breakouts I had almost two years ago..and I have started to really take care of my skin and not to put any products that I am not aware of its ingredients..i also have started to introduce my skin to the double cleansing steps, using AHA and BHA exfoliator, clay mask and all these suits my skin so well Alhamdulillah :) i found all these on blog kak imanabdulrahim. Do browse through her blog cause she wrote everything about skincare.. trust me you will feel like you want to care about your skin more tau after reading her blog! :D



So I think that is all about my 2017.. i think there are more about it but I couldnt recall much..




As for 2018, I had already write several things to do for this year and also plan my-resolution-checklist.. from what i can say, 2018 is going to be a busy year for me.. i want to make 2018 my year which means a better version of me compared to 2017.. InsyaAllah :)





Till then!




9.30pm ,
7 January 2018

They got hitched :)

They all got two rings and I have only one ring. Ok...

22 December 2017,

I went to Terengganu from Penang. Took me 9 hours to get there..if anyone ask me whether it is tiring or not, honestly I don't feel tired at all..I am just super duper hungry in the bus..I only have my mentos...can you imagine how i survived in the bus by eating mentos for 9 hours? also felt a little messed up because tidur bangun tidur bangun tak sampai sampai hahaha..

So when I arrived, this future bride fetched me with kakbal and baby..It was so good to see them like all your serabutness goes away but unfortunately my hungry level still stays the same..then we went to eat and bought few things and went here and there..she drove all the way..

When I arrived home, I was so reluctant to get inside..like this is not my home how can I ever be here? But then..ummi ayah were so nice to me :') Awkward at first but then it was okay Alhamdulillah..then we ate some cake and settled up things..because I could see ummi ayah were already tired, so I helped her doing the chores..but not that much pun..

We slept late that night..putting on mask, finishing the beads on her veil, ironing kurung and basically doing everything for tomorrow's event..we slept at 3 am..

23 December 2017.

Dear kakak..I'm so happy to see now. Compare to what has happened to you like five years ago and now, is like something I dream it to happen to you.. I am truly truly grateful that you are someone's fiance now and that I hope he will act nicely towards you.. He better do lah. Kakak, I don't like makeup. I hope I don't have to wear makeup again..i look so weird wearing makeup and I don't like the removal of makeup part because it is tiring haha..took me almost 15 minutes to remove it completely..you have to know that i felt so relieve when I got my skin back haha

This year, you will be in another new step in your life..a new step means new responsibilities come and I know you will get through it just like you get through those freaking hardy rock salty ups and downs five years..I can't wait to be in your house again and meet ummi ayah and everyone but not you hahaha :p 

Happy engagement my dear sister! 

A day after, on 24 December 2017 my another bestfriend got hitched too :') We are bestfriend since 2013 up until now..

The journey is the same, took almost 9 hours from Terengganu to Rawang..got my ticket at 9.30 pm and arrive just before subuh..I was tired and thinking of how I am going to Rawang because I honestly and seriously don't know the route..all the way actually i just redah and go with the flow..i was thinking of getting a grab but quite scared but if that is the only choice then i can actually go with it..

and I am so grateful that he picked me up and sent me to her house..I get to see him after two months eventhough it was just for less than an hour hehe thank you awak :)

Once I got inside, my body felt a little bit tired..and I slept for an hour before the event..she woke me up and I rushed myself to get prepared because the MUA was already there..i wish i didn't sleep at that time because i seriously didnt get myself well prepared..i waited her to get her makeup done because the MUA doesnt want more than two people in the room so she chose me to be there.. and all along it was me who was with her and it reminds me of our memories where i had always went to her house and lepak for hours :')

I ate pulut kuning and sambal ikan bilis...they are so good!! I hope I will get to eat it again at your wedding........please make sure they are there!!


Dear Nabilah,

Seeing you as someone's fiance now really makes me happy!! You have always wanted it to happen and now it really does :') This year too, you will move to another new step in your life and as I said it brings responsibilities and I know you can carry it..You have always being good to me, and never forgets me and always be the first one who wishes me the birthday wish.. I am so happy. Like seriously!!

And I ate a lot at her house..like it was a never-ending phase of eating haha..it was so good to lepak and share stories after almost one year tak jumpa..:')






There are people who asked me why did I took the trouble to travel to two different states in less than 4 days..why? Because they are my sisters :) They want me to be there so I be there..and those dates are the first four days of my study week so it's like a study-week-travel for me..I don't mind travelling all the way because once I get there seeing them, it is all worth it..like it is something that is not always happening in my life also their life so I think it is okay to travel that far for them..

For me, it is the presence that counts :)

13 OGOS 2016.

First time ever ke padang..and saw him playing..

One of the blessings..

Apparently almost three years ago, I never knew what love is all about..I thought it was just some kind of a must have relationship that a girl and a boy must do..in order to understand the meaning..but everything change since I get to know you..i don't know how to describe it because it feels magic? Weird? Experiencing some breakups makes me wonder How Does It Feels To Have Someone Who Loves You Sincerely and Respectfully and Most Importantly You Yourself Could Feel That Guy Sincerity...above all yes the latter is the most important. It is like the way you can feel your parents' love towards you..their passion..the way they cares about you..the way the always asked you whats wrong and the way your parents always have your back whenever something not good came up..and I do set an intention of I dont wanna meet a  new male friend anymore I just want to stick with the one that I already have..bear in mind that I didnt set anyone, any of my male friend.. All I have in my mind while berniat was merely My Unikl friends..and now I realised that he was one of my close friend at that time.. Since then, it makes me wonder  how this "Niat" things really works and why Allah took my 'niat' seriously and why did He gives me so much blessings that I never thought I would own them now....I think it is so important for us to take care of our Niat in everything we do..because Allah listens and He knows every single thing we do.. and do you know that Allah will help you if you are about to do something good? Like have you ever been in a state of wanted to wake up for Tahajud and then suddenly you wake up in the middle of the night? I think we all have this experience kan :)

Life is about reflecting every single thing around us..
And my thoughts is we have to keep looking and taking care of our own actions, and trying our best to keep doing good..
And set your Niat before anything :)

Ma.

We planned to give her a new television..

Because it's her birthday month..

But instead, she gave us new presents..

:')

Thank you Ma for you never stopped showering us with anything we want ❤️

Thank you Ma for your never ending love and cares as well as your attention to us eventhough we are big enough to think about ourselves.. You are just amazing!

Yes she will be the one who would sacrifice for us..be it money or time or anything despite her workloads..

Whenever I wish to have something that I cannot afford to buy it on my own, she will be the one who  offers to buy them for me...and I can say I got everything I wanted now merely because of her willingness to buy them for me! ❤️

I feel like I could never repay her kindness or be like her..

But I will try my best to at least get that positive attitude from her and pays her back in my own way InsyaAllah 💕

I love you so much Ma ❤️

The meaning of the real love is to ; get closer to Allah

I browsed through an Instagram of this one man who had just lost his beloved wife.

I really could not imagine myself if I were at in his shoes..

Losing the one that you love is..literally unbearable.

And I am really sure Allah tests him because HE loves him.

No other reasons for that.  :)

I like reading their caption.

It's like I am reading this one story of true love ; between a husband and a wife.

The sacrifices he made, and the pain she had to go through..

It is...how sweet. This is the real sweetness. The real love.

From their captions, I could see how deeply they fall into each other..

I'm still in awe. Everytime I open my ig, I would always find myself to go back to their instagram.

It makes me to think that love is not just love. It is more than that.

For me, love is about accepting our loved ones flaws. Sounds cliche I know..but it's true!

And what I love about them are how keen they want to be reunited in Jannah :')

Then I realized, the real love is the one who brings you closer to Allah.

The one who is working his time out to make the relationship halal.

The one who always reminds you to miss Allah and Rasulullah..not him.

The one who trying hard to learn and upgraded his knowledge, especially the crucial part of Islam for the sake of your future.

In the end we all want to be in Jannah..

It hits me when I read this one caption, or maybe a motivation quote. I can't really remember it that well though but I kinda get the idea.. It states....

"If you love someone, you will bring them towards the Jannah..not the other one."

I don't trust this at first because I don't understand it and just pretending that I understand.

Like it was not a big deal and oh ok it was just a quote..

But you know when your other half act differently and he changed slowly..you just knew it.

Figured it out, and I know this is the reason. He was true.

And the moment I realized that Allah sent him to me, revising those caption to me I know Allah wants the best for me. 

And you know, Allah really does not want to punish us.

Allah wants us to be in Jannah..

It strikes me whenever I read the Quran and I read the meaning, there are just like lots of reminder that Allah Maha Pengampun. Allah Maha Penyayang. Allah Maha Pemurah. and Maha means it's really big that none can ever compared to.

Allah wants us to do good deeds because it benefits ourselves. Clearly it benefits us for this temporary dunia and the akhirat :)

When you struggle to bring yourself closer to Allah, you will noticed that your heart is at ease.

All problems easily solved.

Your relationship with human just get better and even more better.

Your daily routine seems to settle easily!

Your heart tends to talk to itself..because you know it was Allah who helped you to settle those things down.

And many more.

I bet you surely know and feel more :)

It is really really special. This connection between us and Allah is so special.

Like none can beat this. Like this heart, our heart is telling us which is wrong which is right.

What should we do and whats not and need to be avoided.

Isn't this is a miracle? This little heart is telling us..and is showing the true way for ourselves.

It shows that your heart really wants you to get closer to Allah..

I find this is why the heart becomes uneasy or not at peace whenever I disobey Allah..

For example, solat procrastination. I named it that way, don't search for it in the dictionary ok! :p

You solat but you tangguh. Tapi Allah tak suka kita tangguhkan solat, dan ianya berdosa!

That is why our heart is not at ease when we delay our solat! 

That is just one example..we can actually figured it more. And I believe we are aware of what we did.

So, please bring yourself closer to Allah..then only you see everything falls perfectly and how magic it could be :)

Just my late night thoughts..

2.55 am, 12jan

The happiest dream!

It was 10 am in the morning..if I'm not mistaken..




Malam sebelumnya I couldn't sleep because I was staying up..trying to sleep in the morning but cannot! Guess the caffeine works so much to my body hehe!



So I had this one dream... I am really sure by far it was the happiest dream that I ever had in my life..




So what is it in that dream sampai claim it was my happiest dream?



hehehehehehehhehe




the dream began....




He was in the car. So then I came and want to enter the car..



He sat on the seat next to the driver..




I stood besides the driver door...




He was taking out something then.....





Then....










then......


















then.......................
















then..................















then...................................

















he showed me THREE RINGS!!!!!!!!!!!











and sambil tunjuk tu, he even said "taraaa tengok ni cincin untuk awak."










Why 3 rings?? I have no idea~ hahahah






I remembered myself in that dream, takdela terkejut and happy sangat..macam "oh ok cincin....."







tapi pelik...






so I said to him "why got three rings?"














He replied.."beli untuk merisik, bertunang dgn kahwin sekali..senang! beli sebab ada promotion."










I said.."why so suddenly?????" 











Masa tu tak terfikir part beli 3 cincin sebab ada promotion hahaha!!











Then I don't know what happen...next dream chapter.....!







**************





I was late...I ran onto the stairs...







Then I saw something happen at the ruang tamu..







I don't know but it was blurry.. what happen pun taktau la but then I heard someone was telling me...








"Tula lambat...rugi tak tengok tadi!"








I was like...searching for the suara all over the place..











Where did it came from???And most importantly, FROM WHOM??









WHO SAID IT? I don't know about that either hahaha!









But I remember myself wearing a white gown dress...with veil on top of my head..







***********



Next chapter..








I suddenly felt happy...Like I don't know how to describe but I felt TRULY HAPPY!!!





Then at one time...





I remembered whispering to myself...







"Oh camni ke perasaannya bertunang & jadi hak milik orang???"










THE END!










Then I woke up with seribu satu persoalan...




What kind of dream is that??!!!!




Dahla in the middle of study week lagi! hahaha

Pastu takleh go nya, those 3 rings dibeli time promotion???? what?? agakla hahaha




I saved here sebab benda ni meaningful. Teehee. Bukan selalu nak dapat mimpi macamni. :D








************


To be truth, I didn't think anything related to marriage now sebab dah selalu sangat ditanya and selalu sangat disuruh kahwin because-I-am-the-oldest.





So sebab dah selalu kena tanya, hati ni dah macam kebal dah haha!




Kalau dulu sikit2 nak terasa..sikit2 nak touching bila degree tak habis orang lain dah habis pastu boleh kahwin awal blablablabla.



Pastu macam wait...keadaan sekarang ni macam belum membenarkan untuk ke arah itu so why you stress sangat sebab orang sekeliling dah kahwin? Nak berlumba ek sape kahwin dulu?



Perasan tak banyak je benda yang belum dicapai lagi?
Perasan tak kahwin tu bermaksud menambah tanggungjawab?
Perasan tak kahwin tu perlukan ilmu?



Honestly dah redha tak kisahla nak kahwin bila but not now la :)



Not even close to engaged because we once pernah la discuss taknak engaged, nak terus je! haha jimat




Lagipun kita taktau siapa jodoh kita kan. Nak berangan lebih2 takde gunanya tapi doa semoga dia tu jodoh kita wajib ada :)







But still, itu the best mimpi! haha kbai until next entry inshaaAllah :)



Assalamualaikum! :)

study week part 1 - semester 3

HTV
BI
SHE
BIOSTAT
PENGAJIAN ISLAM


I'm making coffee for myself now :)

Semoga semua soalan exam senang lah hendaknya Aamiin :)

Hampir empat tahun.

Assalamualaikum :)

Bulan Oktober 2016 ni genap empat tahun saya kenal awak. Masuk UniKL Julai 2012. Tempoh empat tahun ni adalah kenal yang betul-betul kenal daripada stranger. Banyak yang saya belajar dari awak sepanjang perkenalan kita.

Tak sure samada awak ingat atau tak kita kenal dah nak masuk empat tahun sebab awak bukan jenis yang suka kira mengira nih kan hehe.. tapi bagi saya saya suka sangat kira sebab setiap tahun tu berharga :) Saja saya nak save semuanya kat sini supaya bila-bila nanti boleh baca balik. Ni pun ingat-ingat lupa time menaip ni ^-^

Waktu orientasi UniKL, awak lelaki pertama yang saya terpandang and judge playboy. Padahal ramai je lelaki lain kat situ. Bila difikir balik kenapa la saya terfikirkan awak, sampai sekarang tak ada jawapan. So it goes all the way..zaman Kledang saya nampak awak turun bas, naik bas. Awak tahu saya selalu tengok awak keluar makan malam naik kereta melalui tingkap. I always saw you. Memang sengaja pergi dekat tingkap lepas maghrib camtu semata-mata nak tengok awak haha. Paling malu bila awak tahu saya tengok so takpelah bye haha.

Ada satu moment yang mana bas nak ke u kita, and you were in front of me. I stood behind you and tulah pertama kali saya berdiri dekat. Ada banyak moment masa kita berkawan biasa tu yang membuatkan saya malu sendiri sebab awak tahu semuanya pasal saya. So takpelah malu lagi so bye haha.

Ada moment masa study week. I asked you to buy makanan kucing and I waited. Bila sampai, then awak pun pass makanan tu melalui pagar. My heart beating so fast la time tu. Nasib tak lupa segala ilmu yang dah study haha. I still remember, you wore long sleeves black shirt, black cap, seluar pun black semua lah black. And you were carrying something on your back tak ingat dah apa dia. I just smiled. Masuk rumah Allah je tahu how I felt. And awak tahu saya happy masa tu so malu lagi so takpelah bye haha.

Saya bersyukur sebab boleh berkawan dengan lelaki sebaik dan sejujur awak. Walaupun orang kata masa berkawan ni biasanya memang tak tunjuk semua tapi saya tetap percaya dengan apa yang saya rasa. So far baru berkawan setahun lebih, rasanya ujian haritu lah yang terbesar sekali. And it was all from me. Tapi betapa awak nak jugak mengaku yang itu berpunca daripada awak. Masa tu rasa serba salah sangat..In fact now pun still ada lagi rasa serba salah bila teringat and I try to learn and appreciate setiap apa je yang awak buat untuk saya. I once asked you apa dia je ujian yang biasanya orang berhubungan ni akan alami, awak jawab kita tak tahu apa akan jadi tapi akan ada ujian tu. So from now, saya cuba jaga dari segala segi supaya bila ujian tu melanda, we will always remain as a team :)

The way awak support saya, membebel bila saya cerita problems sebenarnya saya suka :) Saja perli-perli sebab jarang nak jumpa lelaki yang suka membebel ni hehe. Bila awak balik kerja penat-penat, saya cuba untuk tak kacau sebab faham awak penat tapi tuptup awak je yang selalu start dulu. Still tanya dah makan ke atau how was my day etc. When I'm on my 'leave', hanya Allah dan awak je tahu perangai saya macam mana haha. Spamming whatsapp non-stop, boleh moody tiba-tiba balas sepatah-sepatah padahal dengan abah mama saya ok je tapi bila nampak je whatsapp awak naik terus berubah jadi budak-budak. Dengan harapan awak akan pujuk + bagi perhatian. And you did :)

Bila awak balik training penat-penat, saya cuba untuk tak kacau awak jugak. So what I did was, I will wait. Wait wait wait. Kalau after 12 am tak ada means awak dah tidur and saya okay je :) Tapi macam biasa, benda tu takkan jadi sebab awak yang akan selalu tanya or start the conversation first asking me macam soalan tadi. Walaupun awak penat, tapi still awak ingat saya. In a way, saya rasa dihargai :) Always rasa dihargai. Rasa tu tetap sama macam sejak 2012 dulu. And I hope it will kekal sampai bila-bila InShaaAllah :)

I think I learned something from you. Always kena ada rasa jujur + appreciate partner. It needs two, not one :)

Now that you are working, saya tahu awak kerja sungguh-sungguh walaupun kerja tu awak kata buat badan awak malas-malas etc. Sebab awak kan suka bergerak, tak macam saya ni haha. Awak suka isi hari-hari awak dengan aktiviti yang pada saya patutnya awak rehat je duduk rumah sebab itu je cuti yang awak ada. Tapi cara kita fikir lain so ikut awak lah nak bergerak banyak-banyak pun haha. Degil awak saya boleh tahan lagi sebab bila saya membebel, that shows yang saya ni hampir tak tahan sebab risaukan awak je sebenarnya. Macam awak nak sangat main bola walaupun badan sakit2 dengan alasan bila main bola tu boleh elokkan sakit tu, em apa lagi eh. Banyak la sebenarnya. Bab migrain belum masuk lagi, still insist nak drive jugak walaupun migrain.            

-_________-"

I'm not perfect. Kadang rasa macam awak ni baik sangat untuk saya, terlalu baik tapi taknak la tengok awak dengan orang lain hahah so takpelah kita proceed k haha. Ada masa-masanya saya down pun awak akan selalu ada..bukan bermaksud family tu tak ada cuma bila di waktu-waktu tertentu saya lebih selesa share dengan awak :)

 The way awak jaga family, adik-adik pun dah cukup buat saya impress. Saya bersyukur :) Apa je benda yang awak buat tak buat saya happy? :') Saya jarang sangat bagitau sebab rasa macam tak penting so I save them here. Bila awak share masalah, itulah perkara paling best saya rasa sebab awak share dengan saya. The feeling of..oh he trusted me....Erm atau benda tu bukan big issue? Ok complicatednya saya haha. I always said kesiannya awak dapat orang pelik macam saya ;D. Seingat saya, awak tak pernah perli saya tapi saya selalu je perli awak so saya nak mintak maaf secara tertutup la kat sini. Boleh? Tu pun kalau awak baca la :p



Remember when I suddenly send,
"Awk tq utk semuanya :)"?



Entri ni sambungannya :)

Untuk 4 tahun sebelumnya, dan tahun-tahun akan datang..

Terima kasih awak :)

Semoga selalu kuat untuk bekerja!

Sincerely, 

Your very very very very very very very very very very clingy human

Assalamualaikum!